Saturday, March 29, 2008

Someone Put Viagra in My Water (or why my leg is always stiff).

Now that I have your attention, lets talk about nipples, or more precisely nipple piercings; like rings and such. Nipple rings and the TSA. Yes, those folks that brought you post Katrina help, the one and the same that seem to continue to F-up airport security (you know what I mean by F-up of course....Fuck-up).

So, a lady tries to fly from Lubbock (home of Buddy Holly) to Dallas and walks through the metal detector just fine. Then, because she was chosen as the special victim to be wanded when her number came up, the TSA agent ran the WAND (you know the WAND):

W= hy
A = ssholes
N = ever
D = ie

And when wanded, right over her breasts, beep.....beep. So what did the Agent do? She called over her (yes, it was a female Agent) male counterparts. And what did they have to say.....lady you need to remove your rings (actually one ring, one bar) or you will not be allowed through security. She asked if she could just show them to the female agent but in all their wisdom and I'm sure with a sly smile and a snide remark, the men handed her a pair of pliers and told her to remove the offending items. That's right, take the ring and bar out of the nipple; we don't want them to be used as a weapon now do we?

The response from TSA.....the Agents followed proper procedure, but we will change the procedure to allow the victim to show us the offending piercing. Next time it will be a labia and another adventure altogether.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Someone has a Birthday

Happy Birthday NK

OK, So I Lied

Yeah, I know, I said I was not going to blog anymore, at least until I found out what it was I had to say.

But I just couldn't resist this. While it is sad, I do have to say that we have done much of our grocery shopping at Wal-Mart. Not much choice, since it one of the best grocery stores in our sad little town. However, I will not set foot in Wal-Mart again. If you haven't already heard this, this is why.

Deborah Shank, a Wal-Mart employee gets into an accident with a semi and ends up permanently brain-damaged. Her Wal-Mart health insurance paid her medical bills, but she also sued the trucking company for damages. She wins $700,000, which after legal fees and expenses, nets her about $400,000, which was put in a trust to pay the nursing home where she now resides.


Wal-Mart gets wind of the settlement and turns around and sues Shank for $470,000, the money its insurance company paid for her care from the accident. Now, the woman is reliant on Medicaid and Social Security and Wal-Mart apparently got a much needed windfall.

Wal-Mart isn't alone in such behavior. Insurance companies seizing lawsuit winnings from catastrophically injured Americans is a common practice that gives lie to the notion that anyone gets rich off a personal injury lawsuit these days, as insurance companies often get first dibs on any judgment or settlement in such cases.

But Wal-Mart's cruelty, as always, is extreme in this case. Not only is Shenk profoundly disabled, but while her family was fighting off the company in court, her son was killed while fighting the war in Iraq and because of the damage she needs to be told each day that her son died in Iraq. Not even bad PR like this, apparently, can eke out a drop of compassion from the retail giant.


It is time to put an end to corporate greed such as this - both on the part of corporations such as Wal-Mart and the insurance industry. Neither of them deserve to be compensated above and beyond the exorbitant premiums we all pay.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Five to One

To paraphrase a portion of the lyrics in the Doors song Five to One, my blogging days are over baby. At least until I can determine what it is I should be talking about. So those of you that visited my space on occasion, I say thanks, and farewell for now. I'll still be reading many of your posts but until then I just be "Waiting for the Sun".

Friday, March 21, 2008

Party Girl

Today I'm going to emulate Mie and talk about a woman's contribution to life, the sporting life.

She was a millionairess party girl, who drank, smoked and was not adverse to slipping through a window, into a friends bedroom at 6:00AM with a bottle of champagne in hand according to her biographer, David Outerbridge. She was also indirectly responsible for the existence of Augusta National, the home of one of golf's greatest tournaments and ironically, one of the remaining bastion's of male chauvinism. She consorted with movie stars, marched for women's suffrage and even "floored the iron gas pedal of an early race car" but golf was her life.

In 1921 she won the Women's Amateur golf championship and over time teed it up with such golf stars and Bobby Jones, Babe Didrikson and Walter Hagen. As founder of the Golf and Tennis club of Long Island, she designed the golf course there. She also owned a prime piece of land near Pebble Beach, California and in 1928, she hired course designer Alister MacKenzie to design and build a golf course there; it's know today as Cypress Point and has one of the most scenic and photographed holes of all time, the par-3 16th.

















The original plan for Cypress did not include this now-famous hole because MacKenzie thought that the shot would be too difficult since it would have to carry over the Pacific Ocean but Miss Hollins disagreed and wanted MacKenzie to build the hole as he imagined it. To prove her point, she dropped a ball, took a hickory shafted 2-wood (called a brassie) and hit the ball 230 yards over the sea where it landed on the current site of the green. Convinced, Mackinzie placed the tee box on that spot and later stated that he was not responsible for the hole. "It was largely due to the vision of Miss Marion Hollins."

Bobby Jones, the founder of Augusta National hired Mackenzie to help him build a new course on rolling woodland in Augusta, Georgia because of his memories of a round at Cypress Point, especially the 16th hole, and the rest is history.

Source: Golf Magazine, April 2008

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Monday, March 17, 2008

Sr. Citizens Shut-in Exercise League

Today, I joined the Sr. Citizens Shut-in Exercise League. No, I don't really consider myself a Sr. Citizen (but I will take the discounts) and I am definately not a shut-in. But I joined anyway.

A Wii has finally passed through our threshold. Wii have been trying to find one since mid-January with, like just about every one else, no luck. So, we checked a few on-line sites and finally found one that guaranteed delivery, at a reasonable price. This was on February 17th. They said it would be shipped on 3/28.

On Saturday I got an email from them that said it had been shipped and it will be here today. So even though it is raining, Wii golf will happen. Now my exercise routine will include bowling, baseball and tennis. not to mention Metroid Prime 3: Corruption and the Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess whatever they are!

So if anyone needs to talk to me today, I may not answer the phone, I will be busy exercising (that is if I can figure out how to install it).

And now, enjoy this interlude from my favorite trio! Happy St. Patricks Day.




Sunday, March 16, 2008

Sunday Scene

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

Port St. Lucie, Florida

In a spectacular case of poor planning, 2 boys on Wednesday tried to rob 2 people after they walked through the front door of a building apparently unknown to the 2 juveniles. The youths, ages 12 and 14, summarily were taken into custody at gunpoint. It seems that they strolled into the Port St. Lucie police station and attempted to rob to 2 civilian employees at the records counter.

Unfortunately for the boys, there were several officers in a nearby room taking a defensive tactics course, said Officer Robert Vega, Port St. Lucie police spokesman. The incident happened about 4:30 p.m. at the station after the boys strolled in. The 12-year-old sauntered to the records counter and then proceeded to another counter where he picked up a phone to talk to a service aid behind a protective window, demanding her cash.


"Not only did he pick up the phone and say, 'Put your hands up and give me your money,' he had his hand in his jacket insinuating that he had a gun," Vega said. The boys each face an attempted armed robbery charge.

Although only the 12-year-old demanded money, the other boy also is being charged in connection with the incident because he "knew what was going to happen." "He was a willing participant in the entire event," Vega said. The 14-year-old also faces a violation of probation charge.

"They were either very brazen or very dumb, but I think the latter," Vega said.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Beware, Idus Martiae

Bad things are supposed to happen today, Julias Caesar was assasinated on this day in 44 BC, after a seer warned him of great peril. He was stabbed to death by a group of Roman Senators to put an end to his alledged monarchial ambitions.





The event was immortalized in the 1798 painting by Vincenzo Cammuccini,



















and of course, William Shakespeare. Ever since Caesar's death, the 15th of March has been associated with impending doom.


Doom can take many forms, it can be as in Caesar's case, death. It can also mean that something will be taken away from you (other than your life). Earlier in the week, there was a forecast that indicated that something that have been given to me would be taken away on this day. The guys and gals that get paid for being frequently wrong suggested that we would have 1 to 3 inches of snow today, and if that were true, the opening of the golf season that was provided on Tuesday, would be dearly departed for at least another week.


Well, as I write this, the prognosticators were thankfully wrong again, no snow will fall today so the Ides of March will not bring the dread of no golf. Maybe I should take care though, for Caesar said just before his death as he greeted the seer with a jest and said: "The Ides of March has come," and the seer said to him softly: "Yes, the Ides of March has come, but it has not passed."



Thursday, March 13, 2008

Dancing with the dog

It's Thursday, 2 days before the ides of March (more on the impending doom on Saturday) and I got nothing..........so, I took a look at my water because someone on TV asked me if my water was pale. I studied it for awhile, compared it to some water I had in a bottle and came to the conclusion that it was indeed pale.


So, I asked myself, isn't that how it is supposed to look? And myself answered back, yes, water should be pale. If it's not pale, it is not water. So next time someone asks me if my water is pale, maybe I'll wait a few minutes to see what it is they are pushing before I turn the stupid fucking commercial off.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

Today I have words, only a brief explantion of what you see below. I have begun to experiment with night photography and we had a little sliver of a moon in the western sky last night. So I loaded my camera on the tripod set the shutter speed and voila.


















Now I know that the legs on the tripod are a little shakey but I kind of like the effect.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Ring, Ring, Ring - Is this the party to whom I am speaking?

We got rid of our land line about a year ago, even though we listed with do not call, we continued to get calls, primarily from people either too drunk or too stupid to dial a phone.


It's 3:00 AM - who's this the caller would say? It isn't Hillary I would say, who are you calling? What else can you say when someone says who is this? I'm sure as hell not going to tell them my name, SSN and checking account number.


We used go always get these calls after the bars closed.....Is Dave there? It was like every night. I wanted to ask him if he was Tommy Chong but I just said "Dave's not here"


So now, NK is getting calls on her cell for Marie. Maybe it's a time space continuum thing and the caller is looking for Marie Curie; maybe a clue to cure dysentery. Perhaps she should play along a little, could be it is a call for Marie Antoinette and it could be to warn her of her impending execution.


Nah, probably just another drunk with fat fingers!

Monday, March 10, 2008

No No Ralph

A message to newly announced candidate Ralph Nader


Sunday, March 9, 2008

Sunday Scene - Muskrat Love, Redux

Hopefully it wasn't muskrat Susie and muskrat Sam!


The Captain and Tennille made the song popular, now a pair of teenagers have taken it a step further. Last month, during the Miss Outdoors beauty pageant, 2 young women did something completely different for the "talent" side of the contest.


As part of the Eastern Shore Festival in Maryland, the pageant is but a portion of the event. Among other activities, there is also a skinning contest, Muskrat skinning and in an unusual turn of events, 2 of the pageant entrants decided to make skinning the rodent a part of their effort to win the pageant.


Samantha Phillips stated she could not sing or dance so why not do something she was good at? During her "demonstration", she described the process of separating the skin from the meat. The next pageant contestant played Fur Elise on the piano. I wonder if the pageant director scheduled the order of the contestants for comedic affect or as a shock reduction effort? In any event, the 2nd "skinner", Dakota Abbott, chose to sing a song by American Idol contestant, Kellie Pickler while she separated the fur from the body.


The beauty of all this is that Miss Abbott won the pageant, and the women's junior world championship skinning contest and Miss Phillips was 1st runner up in the pageant. She also took home a prize in the beginners skinning contest.

Saturday, March 8, 2008

It's Someones Birthday

If you haven't already done so, stop by CK's site and wish her a happy one. As you can see, the girl does love her chocolate.

Friday, March 7, 2008

Friday Games

Mie, via Sybil, has done my kind of meme. No tagging and anyone that wants to participate can make up their own questions after answering 5 from someone else. This could be just pure bullshit or insight into another's soul and therefore fun and/or enlightening.


Here are the 5 questions from Mie.
1. If you won a free trip for four, to anywhere in the world, no expense to you, where would you go, and who would you take with you?
My intiial thought was a trip to Vietnam but for a once in a lifetime adventure, I would take a Warren on a trip to the home of golf, Gail and NK could find something to do while we were playing.


2.If you could only listen to the music of one artist or band, for the rest of your life, who would it be?
I would have to say it would be the Eagles but I would cheat and listen to the individual members solo music also. A close second would be Cream and of course the solo music of Eric Clapton.

3. If you could go back in time, to your 21st birthday and do it all again, knowing what you know now, would you?
If I had to stay there and relive life from 21 on I would say no, I would not go back. Mainly because in the long term, I probably would not change anything I did and it would mean that I would not be able to retire for another 39 years.


4. Sunflower seeds or pumpkin seeds?
Sunflower seeds, shelled, roasted and salted. I love them on a salad.



5. Are you an Organ donor? Why, or why not?
If any of them are worth anything, yes. Just to help someone that could use a lift in life.


And here are my 5 questions:

1. Should there be a redo of the Democratic primaries in Florida and Michigan? If not, how should it be resolved?


2. Gay Marriage or Civil Unions?


3. Which season is your favorite, Spring or Fall? Why?



4. Water ski (surf) or Snow ski (snow board)?


5. New York City or Washington D.C.?

Thursday, March 6, 2008

And the Winner Is?

Here is the question, when Mark Vargas of Santa Clara, California installed the solar panels shown in the picture below, do you think he noticed or gave any thought to the placement of his panels considering the trees in the background?

















Apparently not since he sued his neighbors to have 2 of the trees removed because they violated his "right to sunshine"! In a dispute that seems like it would happen only in California, Vargas asked prosecutors to file charges against his neighbor using an obscure law that predates the common use of solar panels.

Known as the Solar Shade Control Act, The law requires homeowners to keep their trees or shrubs from shading more than 10 percent of a neighbor's solar panels between 10 a.m. and 2 p.m., when the sun is strongest. A tree would be exempt from the law only if it cast a shadow when the panel was installed so any existing tree that had not reached maturity would have to be removed under the current law.

According to the AP, residents can be fined up to $1,000 a day for violations. Vargas says the law protects his $70,000 investment in solar power, and he believes it should be strengthened.

"I think it's unfair that a neighbor can take away this source of energy from another neighbor," he said.

There will not be an appeal since the owners of the trees cannot afford further legal fees.

So who wins here, sadly only the lawyers. Like Reagan said, if you've seen one redwood you've seen them all.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Gasoholics

It was late morning and the sun was playing hide and seek with a thin layer of clouds moving in from the southwest. We were headed back to Counciltucky from Omagawd after a quick trip to Costco (they did not have everything we were looking for and we found out they were discontinuing one of the items that made us decide to buy a membership).

So, heading east on I-80 in the fast lane, doing just a little over the posted speed limit, cars and trucks are passing me a flatulent contestant after a chili eating contest passes gas. And that is what I thought of as they buzzed by, gasoline.

The price at Costco was $2.98 a gallon, cheap by some standards from what I have heard on the news though more expensive than our local Sam's Club price and even at the neighborhood Kum and Go (that's right, if you Kum, you Go, quite a name for a mini-market). The news heads have also been saying that us 'mericans are changing their driving habits because of the rising price of gas.

Well, you sure could have fooled me this morning, everyone seemed to be in a big hurry to empty their tanks as fast as they were motoring. Maybe they just heard about a good deal on gas and were just in a hurry to get there before the price went up.

The end of an era:

For those of you that have not heard the news, Brett Favre is retiring after 17 years in the NFL. In a voice mail left with Chris Mortensen Favre said "I know I can still play, but it's like I told my wife, I'm just tired mentally. I'm just tired."

So long Brett, thanks and enjoy.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Sunday Scene

The Visitor that didn't show up


If you live in Vermont or Rhode Island you must be feeling neglected these past few days. In any event, the candidates have not paid any attention to you because of Ohio and Texas. Just consider yourselves fortunate, you don't want all of "those people" cluttering up your highways and byways anyway.


What's the difference?


Our local paper had a picture in it this morning that sparked a little conversation. The article is about Super delegates (they should do away with them) but that is not what prompted the discussion. It is a subtle thing but it really stands out if you think of it and it what the choice is really all about when it comes down to it.

Do you see it? It's right there in front of you.



















Just look at the signs, the predominant feature on each one. You see it now don't you?

For one candidate the message is about an idea, something that can be accomplished. For the other, well let's just say it's pretty clear what is important to the good Senator from New York. The sign says it all, it is all about Hillary and that, to quote John McCain, my friends is why we can't afford to have another Clinton in the White House.




On the odd side of the news:



Dateline Des Moines, Iowa - the robber of a Des Moines Git-N-Go got away with $115.00 early Friday but it's what he left behind that qualifies him for the crooks are stupid award. At sometime during the robbery he removed his jacket (hot flashes?) and inside one of the pockets was a W-2 form. When the name on the form was checked it turned out to be a 25-year-old with a suspended driver's license who is on probation for theft.


He has apparently now placed himself in a very taxing situation.


Dateline Pasco, Washington - a man had his friend shoot him in the shoulder so he wouldn't have to go to work. At first, Daniel Kuch told deputies that he was a victim of a drive by shooting while he was out jogging. It turns out that he was really trying to get out of a few days of the old grind and at the same time avoid a drug test. Both men have been arrested, Daniel for filing a false report and his unnamed friend for reckless endangerment.


No word from Daniel's employer but I'd bet that it is really safe to say that they are a former employer.



Last but certainly not least, I don't know if it my own typing or something trying to get out so we all know the true story but when I was searching for some information on the Clinton campaign earlier, I kept typing Clingon (I know it is normally spelled with a K but this may be an new strain) in the search engine. This may require further investigation!

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Musing in March - Of Grills and Things

There are signs that Spring may soon be with us, something to take us out of this 3 month funk that has on occasion forced us to hide inside, only venturing past the warmth of front door to gather up the mail or pick up this Sunday paper. What signs are these you ask?

Well for one, a few days ago NK saw a male cardinal in all it's glorious red splendor. They like us seem to hide somewhere during the colder portion of our year. The next sign was the ladybug that NK saw just outside, then another that had managed to invite itself inside (she gently helped in back outdoors).

Yet another feeling that makes me think our colder days are numbered is that we have finally reached March, a birth month, when life jumps forward, starting like a lamb bounding over a small fence (at least that is what we have here) or in some locations like a lion, racing with the wind as if it might be the final kill.

It doesn't hurt that it will be pushing or surpassing 60 today either. I can just hear the sound of the neighborhood kids outside, the noise is laughter, not the grumbling of having to shovel snow. Oh yes, and I can also hear all of those squeaky grill hinges opening (I wonder if anyone is cooking lamb), a true sign that we are about to be reborn.